Not Really But We Used To 

“Are we close?” she asked me with her tone so cynical. 
I can’t decipher her anymore. She’s too unreachable. 
She frowns, and flipped her hair. Her way of saying she was bored.
I wasn’t looking at her. She’s my friend. No, she was my friend. I don’t know her anymore.
“Are we close?” she asked me again with firm voice. 
What have I done wrong?
I can’t help myself, I stared at her for a couple of seconds and say
“not really, but we used to”
Now, I’m the one who walks away and it feels so good.

Photo: ctto


Underneath her Shadow

words by: Christian Jay Sanchez
I hid myself under your shadow
coz I thought, I could find myself there
But under that scathing shadow of yours
There’s a demon hiding and it stops me from growing

We used to be inseparable
What you know,
you must tell me
What I know,
I must tell you

We were fair,
there were no prejudices.
As you walk through the crowd
I kept on hiding under you
I was a coward
I reckoned.

You’ve chained me,
You treated me like a dog
I followed everything you’ve said
I’ve always enthralled by your deceitful smiles.

As I stared at the clear and starless horizon
I saw these palm trees
Waving at me
They could withstand no matter how the wind blows them.

Indeed, truth will always hurt us
but I was thankful because it slapped me
Hurt enough to wake me up
From my awful fantasy
I stand up and break this chain
that connects me from you
I am free,
thank God, I am free

Stairs are sturdy and strong
and the decisions always lie on me
If I fall: I have only two choices
To go back beneath your shadow
Or to start climbing again.

PHOTOS: Copy to the owner


Words by: Christian Jay Sanchez

Ephemeral: /i-fem-rel,’fe-me-,/
something that lasts for a very short time.

If there is one thing I want to last, it would be happiness. Happiness can fade easily, just like when you saw a bubble floating and you are tempted to touch it, but the moment you touch the bubble, apparently it vanished. Something like, you are happy now, you are enjoying the company of your friends. You guys are laughing boisterously because of your ridiculous shenanigans and then you saw your professor walking in the hallway and she told you that you’ll be having a quiz later.

You see what I mean?

Happiness could vanish easily, it’s not a thing that lasts forever.

But, it’s very important to be happy of course. Being happy doesn’t mean everything is perfect, you just choose to smile and laugh despite of the fact that you are dealing with stressful problems.

This may sounds trite but indeed, life is too short. Don’t stress yourself too much. Go and take a break. Laugh as much as you can. Do something you love, do something that will make you happy, do the things that will satisfy yourself.


How many times did I mention this word? Maybe 34. 😂

Happiness (okay it’s already 35) always put on your mind that it is ephemeral. So I advised you to
seize the moment when you are happy.

Remember what Buddha said,

There is no path to happiness: happiness is a path.

–photo: ctto
Special thanks to Ms. Kristhine Joy Lusterio for giving her criticism about my works.


Words by: Christian Jay Sanchez

It feels so foreign,
Am I really belong here?
I am nothing but a filthy miscreant
I killed myself.


the eyes of an innocent child
plastered through my mind
his angelic face and blissful smile

As I step into the darkness
it was eerie,
I thought it was comfortable
I was scared,
I muttered but no voice came out

My faith is about to vanish
And I was hungry,
Hungry for your words
tears are precious
prayer is wonderful

We were free,
but we have limitations,
Happiness and sadness,
they are ephemeral

It is not free,
Its cost is blood
Its cost is death…

photos: ctto